Friday, February 8, 2013

CURSE IN DISGUISE

      It is often said that sometimes it is blessing in disguise , which means even though  certain situation may appear to be bad , it may be other way round and it may be good . That is why it is called blessing in disguise .But I am describing the exact opposite situation .Which means that the things on surface appear to be good , but in reality they are bad . I remember reading about a study . The people who were ' stood up ' at the time of wedding, were asked if that was the worst day in there life . Think about it . All the preparations are made for the wedding and then the bride or bridegroom does not show up and the wedding is cancelled . Would it be not the worst day in the life ?But the answer surprised the people who were doing the survey . Majority of the people felt that it was the best day in the life or may be the luckiest day in their life . They felt that if they would have gotten married and the had to get divorce , that would have been the worst situation . So getting 'stood up 'saved them the misery of undergoing the divorce.So it was the blessing in disguise .
      I am telling you short story that appears to be good , but was not good . I was seeing this patient who was close to 100 years of age . His wife was 96 or 97 years old . At one time both got admitted to the hospital . He had pneumonia and congestive heart failure . He did OK for a while , but then started getting worse. At that time his wife was admitted too . She had bad bronchitis and so we put both of them in the same room . As his condition continued to get worse , I talked to him and her and he was made DNR. In next 2 days he died . She was discharged in improved condition . She came to see me on follow up . She continued to do well . In next couple of weeks I saw a new patient , who happen to be her sister and who was year older than her . When I came to know that she was sister of my patient I said that you have great geans and are lucky. My patient stated that it was not that great and it was not blessing . She told me that her 'life partner ' was gone , her memory was not the greatest , her hearing was going down , so was her vision . So what good it was that she was 96 or 97 years old . I had no answer .
      I realised this , as I am seeing more and more patients who are in their nineties . One guy was mad as his driving licence was suspended and he had to depend upon others to go places . I visited India and saw a couple , husband is 93 and wife is 88 years old. She can't see, to a point that she can not watch TV or read a book . Her walking was difficult and she fell down few times .The husband has to do every thing in the house. I have known some older people who choke on food or are confined to house as they can't walk . So I really understand that just living longer is not a blessing . In fact what appears to be blessing is actually a curse in disguise .

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